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Caveman Beer Reviews: Black Toad Dark Ale

on 9/28/17 by Miguel A. Suro
1 Comment

Note: This is a series I call Caveman Beer Reviews, because I like to drink beer but am a caveman when it comes to beer knowledge. I know only the basics, and do not have a refined palate. I’ll review the beers on price and what they look, smell, and taste like to me.

Beer: Black Toad Dark Ale

Bottom Line: An extremely gaseous beer with little discernible taste. I did not like it.

Price: About $5.99 for a 6-pack of 12 ounce bottles.

My Rating: 1.5 out of 5

Details

My wife got this for me as part of a Trader Joe’s beer sampling, since she loves to help out with my Caveman Reviews series. Although the name of this beer is certainly attention-grabbing, I had no idea what to expect.

Origin: San Jose, California

San Jose, CA

Alcohol: 5.3%

Looks: A dark glass standard beer bottle with a pretty cool label that for some reason reminds me of a late-night jazz joint like the one in Eyes Wide Shut (an awesome, though odd, movie) (if you haven’t seen it, I would suggest watching it at night with some wine, when you’re in a mischievous mood).

Behold the jazz bar from Eyes Wide Shut

Anyways, the Black Toad beer is a dark brown color.

Smell: Light malty and chocolaty smell.

Taste: Unlike Eyes Wide Shut, I found the Black Toad disappointing. The reason is because, despite being so dark, it doesn’t taste like much of anything.

If I had to look for a taste, I’d say it’s a little bitter. However, the beer is also very gaseous and, when you combine it with the lightness of the taste, the fizz is overwhelming and is the main sensation you get when you drink this.

It’s also rather watery, and just leaves your mouth fizzing from the gas in it.

Hangover Factor: Nothing unusual. I’m a male in reasonably good health born in 1983.

Final Thoughts

Although well-priced and good-looking, the Black Toad does not really taste like much except a bunch of bubbles. Kind of like Perrier.

Credit: GIF from Giphy.

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About Miguel A. Suro

I'm Miguel A. Suro, a Miami dad, attorney, journalist, and entrepreneur devoted to helping you live well for less. I've been seen on the NY Times, CNBC, NBC News, and more. Get to know us on:

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Comments

  1. RF says

    February 12, 2019 at 10:26 pm

    Yes, this beer might be boring or plain, but what many don’t realize is that it has the chocolate and malt flavor and bitterness without the overwhelming ABV, like many stouts. If I want a bittersweet chocoalte, malt flavored beer on a cold winter night that isn’t at 9+ ABV and going to knock my socks off, this is actually a fantastic offering by Trader Joe’s at a more than reasonable price. I would give it a 4+ out of 5.

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